The closest I came to meeting Joan Rivers was when she spoke at the Lucky Magazine FABB Conference in 2011. She was a lively, entertaining guest, and made sure to remind us several times to watch her new show, Joan and Melissa: Joan Knows Best. The conference was running a Q&A with Joan on Twitter, and I asked what I most wanted to know: How did Joan deal with her many critics? My question was selected.
“F–K EM!” she said matter-of-factly, with a fly-swatting wave of her hand.
After Joan’s passing, Melissa Rivers penned The Book of Joan, full of memories and anecdotes of her mother’s work ethic, quirks and family life. Here’s what surprised me most.
- She loved true-crime TV. Joan’s DVR included Wives with Knives, Scorned, Forensic Files, Lockup, Lockup Raw, and Law & Order. She and Melissa also bonded over reading true crime books. Joan’s favorite character in literature was Ted Bundy.
- She carried a giant purse full of stuff everywhere she went. There is a whole chapter on the purse, and it apparently always weighed between 18 and 25 pounds. Needless to say, Joan often had a hard time finding her cell phone.
- She rarely ever read what was written about her. I suppose, in light of Joan’s attitude towards her critics, this revelation should not have been surprising. “Melissa, I don’t need to hear strangers say terrible things about me; that’s why I have family.” In the internet age, proliferated with armchair critics and an increasing pressure towards political correctness, a public figure who doesn’t respond to, or even read, her criticism is rare. (For more on this, check out “Joan Rivers and the Power of Not Apologizing” over at Esquire.)